So what does Focus on the Family say about work-family conflict?

I gave a teaser of my paper earlier this week, and some people have expressed interest. Of course, I won't post my paper here, but I have selected the most representative statement from the FOF website about work-family conflict (which is, apparently, only a woman's problem).

I'm too tired tonight to offer commentary. Let me know what you think.

Potential writing crisis (pretty much) averted

So my paper I was writing for my women's studies class? Due next Tuesday, right? Wrong! Due tomorrow at 4:00 p.m.! I discovered this in class today because I'm a flake who does not look at her syllabus. Which, by the way, says in big capital letters: LATE PAPERS WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED. NO EXCEPTIONS!!!

Fortunately, I have fairly good work habits, so I had already done a good chunk of the paper. I also like to plan my papers to death before I write, so I had done a ton of reading and note taking and outlining. So I managed to write ten pages between 12:30 and 7:00 today and to edit my works cited page. My husband helped me out by picking up RB from daycare and taking her on a little excursion to give me a couple more hours to work before they were home (no way can I work with her around, even if my husband is home to help). So things are all better now. I just have to write a conclusion, then do some minor editing and proofreading tomorrow. And I even get to go to bed at a decent hour.

You know, it's nice to be a student in a real class sometimes. Makes me a little more sympathetic to my students.

Supadiscomama!

Supadiscomama is trying to be sneaky and start a blog without telling anyone. But I see you!

have a laugh

I like to read Indexed, and this post made me giggle today.

But before I get started, here's something on the Christian Coalition

Yesterday I heard this NPR story about the head of the Christian Coalition stepping down because he wanted to expand the agenda to include poverty and the environment. I don't want to turn this into a political or a religious blog, so I've been avoiding some of these issues here. But this deserves a link, and if it ends up on another blog, say The Rhetorical Situation, I might engage in some discussion as I have before (but I certainly don't intend to make Harrogate feel obligated to respond).

So, anyway, I've been talking about the movements of politically active evangelicals away from the stereotypical "religious right" for a long time, asserting that the beliefs of all evangelicals are not necessarily reflected by James Dobson and certainly not by Pat Robertson (granted many do agree with them but the consensus is not as uniform as it sometimes appears). This dissonance has been in my mind for a long time and when I first started expressing it aloud, meeting understandably skeptical responses from friends, it seemed to me to exist as a kind of silent majority. Now they are not silent, and mainstream media outlets like Newsweek and NPR are picking up on the stories.

I am certianly not denying that many evagelicals strongly believe in the principles of the religious right as it has been narrowly defined in the past. But many have other priorities and cannot be lumped in with those who have created the stereotypes we have today. And now those people are becoming politically active and visible. Many people are faithful evangelicals earnestly trying to do "what Jesus would do," and they believe that Jesus is leading them in different directions than the Christian political leaders have been leading them.

Edited to add: The paper I am writing is a discourse analysis of Focus on the Family's advice to mothers, specifically on work-family conflict. So this post is right along with academics and motherhood. So I'm not as off-topic as I originally thought (certainly more on-topic than posting a picture of my pecan pie). Now off to write.

Writing all day long

That's what I'm doing. No good blogging this week. Sorry.

The Speed of Meme (not following directions)

I'm sure I'm overthinking this whole meme experiment, but here's my response. I don't post memes. I don't know if I've ever posted a meme on this blog. I like to read them sometimes and I may post one in the future if it appeals to me, but so far I just don't do it. So I don't know if I should be counted in this whole thing.

But I do link to things I find interesting, and I find this interesting, especially since they're going to talk about it at MLA. So here's a link to the Speed of Meme experiment. I'm not following the directions for tracking the meme, but I am responding in the way I typically respond to things I read on other blogs--a link and a nod (look, I made a pun)--and Scott can do with it what he will.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Mmmm...
I think we'll start with this.

another blogger on "balance"

In this week's spirit of lazy posting, here's a link to Mom and Much More's "On Balancing." She expresses what I know many working mothers feel.

The issue of work-family conflict has been at the front of my mind for several weeks now, and I have a post simmering. I haven't gotten to it because I don't want it to be totally abstract and I am a bit too emotional when it becomes about me. I tried to talk to my husband about it this week and ended up in tears. That is not to say that I am unhappy in my life--I think that I have figured out how to make being a student and being a mother mesh pretty well, which was not the case in my daughter's first year. But there are long term concerns because my responsibilities will change dramatically once I am on a tenure track (or struggling as an adjunct, whatever my fate may be). Things will change then, and I will pay a mommy tax in the long run.

Delurk!

Since day care is closed tomorrow, deadlines are approaching, and I'm still throwing up several times a week, I'm taking the easy way out for blogging this week. According to Profgrrrrl, whom I just added to my Google Reader, it is Thanksgiving Delurking Week! My numbers have been creeping up there, so I know there are some new people around.

If you've never commented before, now's the time! Make yourself heard! Here or anywhere--it is always a pleasant surprise when I get comments on posts from way back.

and now for some whining about pregnancy

Obviously, it is often difficult to be a graduate student with a child. Especially in my situation because my husband has one of those jobs that he couldn't do without someone at home providing the "family work"--cleaning (but I am, admittedly, a bad housekeeper), cooking, child care, paying bills, balancing the checkbook, etc.

But, you know, it's also pretty hard to be a pregnant graduate student, too. This goes for any career, I'm sure, but people don't really talk about how hard it is to work while you're pregnant (and it varies tremendously from one woman to another). I experienced this with my first pregnancy, too--during the first three months I could hardly do anything because I was so sick and tired, which meant that I was much less productive and my worked piled up so I had a lot to catch up on when I felt better.

This one is harder because the sick and tired is persistently lingering on. I am almost 20 weeks pregnant and I am still throwing up. I thought maybe it was over this week but I started this morning heaving into the toilet. And now I have to work. And I have let things pile up so I have to work well and work efficiently. Ick. I keep waiting for the easy phase to start. I remember an easy phase before, but it is nowhere in sight right now.

My Two Blogs; or, Where does venting belong?

As I put together my class for next semester, which includes a substantial blogging assignment, I have been obsessing again over blogs and audience. (See these two early posts) Also, I have two blogs now, so there have been a couple of times when I have asked myself which blog should I post to. And then Je m'amuse commented on this post that not telling anyone about her blog leaves her "safe to vent." I've also seen the word "vent" come up in comments on the various posts discussing Dr. Crazy's current predicament.

I am very conscious of my audience--I feel like I know pretty well who is reading my blog but I also know that any number of people connected to me IRL could find my blog through the grapevine. I do want to be sure that nothing I say here will get me into trouble or, as I have discussed before, violate the trust of my students. I don't really vent much here, but of course, I have my moments, like the recent vent about my father-in-law's comments about my job. I posted that here because (1) it is directly relevant to my blog "topic" and to the majority of my readers, who have experienced similar problems with family, and (2) no one who is connected in any way to my in-laws has my blog address. There's no chance that he will read this. I have read other bloggers discussing problems with family, friends, and colleagues--not unusual by any stretch-- and, as Anastasia experienced during her committee ordeal, people like to read about other people's problems. If that weren't the case, this whole blog thing wouldn't be so popular. But things become sticky when the people you are venting about are the ones reading your blog.

When I posted my vent today about my difficult pregnancy, I chose this blog because I know that a lot of my readers have kids or are considering having kids and might have an interest--moms like to talk about mom stuff. And it fits the "motherhood and academia" theme. I did not post it on my other blog, which is all about our family, including pregnancy updates, because of the audience I have chosen for that blog. Those readers are family members and friends, and the tone is decidedly warm and fuzzy. "Being pregnant kind of sucks sometimes" is not warm and fuzzy, and I prefer, when I feel better, to post something along the lines of "Look how cute RB's pigtails are."

This post was much more coherent in my head--my point is that we bloggers must be conscious of our audience all the time, especially if venting is a component of the blog (and I do not deny the cathartic benefits of venting). If we're venting about a student, that clearly has the potential for professional problems. If we're venting about people in our personal lives, that has the potential for hurt feelings and damaged relationships--sort of like walking up on someone gossiping about you behind your back. And it is not nice to out a blogger who clearly wishes to remain anonymous. I am a little irritated on Dr. Crazy's behalf. (But I am not too concerned with being anonymous, so if you know me I don't mind if you tell people about my blog--it's just the whole Google thing I'd like to avoid.)

As for venting on my blogs, I will judiciously vent a little here, I won't vent much at all on the other one, and most of my venting will be on the phone or in the office with my friends. Unless I decide I need a vent-safe blog. And I won't be telling you about it if I do.

church sign

There is Baptist church in my university town with a huge, ever-changing sign on a busy street. I have always appreciated a well-thought church sign--sort of a "sentence sermon" I've heard it called. But the sentences on this sign puzzle me, and my husband and I have decided we should start collecting them to share with friends (The Rhetorical Situation crew should make a point to drive by it every so often). A few weeks ago, it read,

"The letter I is always in the middle of anxiety."
I have come up with several interpretations, but this is one I still fail to get.

This week, it reads,
"Faith is like driving in the fog."
Wow. So faith is extremely hazardous and should be avoided if at all possible.

I think that someone should call the church sign guy and give him some feedback. He needs help.

Teaching carnival

Teaching carnival #16 is here.

my online students are being very quiet

Update on ethical dilemmas: I have decided that I will continue to blog about my class but I will avoid references to specific students. That talk will have to stay in the office. (Which is somehow not so bad?) I am still struggling with the Turnitin issue.

For the first time, my students are working on a project with an extended working period--about a month--and it's wrapping up this week. This whole time they have been very quiet. they have small weekly assignments, and they are logging on and doing those, but only two have actually asked questions about the assignment they are working on now. I post announcements frequently, urging them to keep in touch with me, but it has been to no avail. I am sure that some students have felt disconnected from me because of the online format, but this is the first time that I have really felt disconnected from them. I have no idea what is going on.

I can't help but feel like this means they are doing pretty much nothing and will try to throw together their reports in the next two days. We'll see.

Masters before doctorate?

This week a Googler posed the question, "Should I work on a master's if I'm going to get a doctorate degree?" I know that most of my readers are past the point at which the answer might be helpful, but I'll offer my opinion for the benefit of future Googlers.

There are a few disadvantages to getting the master's first--mostly it just takes longer, and master's students do not typically get the same level of support that doctoral students get. Based on conversations with friends who have gotten a master's and remained at the same institution for the doctorate, some feelings of burn-out are likely--it is a long time to be in one place, and you have to jump through the hoops for one degree, just to start over on a new one.

Having said that, I think that in many cases it is a good idea to get the master's degree first. In the final year of my undergraduate program, I started the process of applying into doctoral programs and did not complete my applications. I took the GRE general and subject tests, got recommendations, polished writing samples, etc., but the process of applying made me realize that I was not ready for that step. A doctoral program is a huge, long-term commitment to an institution and to yourself, and I was not prepared to take that step yet. I decided to apply to the master's program at my undergrad university--I knew I could do it in two years and, of course, it did not carry the anxiety of relocating (my personal life was also in upheaval, which contributed to that decision).

After a year of graduate work, I started my doctoral applications again. Better writing sample. Better personal statement. Better test scores. And I actually had an idea about how to choose a school. Because I got my Master's degree first, my doctoral applications were better, my scholarship was more mature, and I was better prepared to commit to a doctoral program for the long haul. I still had a lot of anxiety starting at a new school and I certainly dealt with imposter syndrome (alas, it lingers on), but I benefited tremendously from taking that middle step. And I got a degree out of it.

We're having a girl!

Little Bit is a girl, and her name is Annabelle (middle name pending). She is due April 12. Happy happy joy joy.

Since RB has a code-name, then I guess Annabelle should be AB. But I still like to call her Little Bit. I think it's a Southern thing.

ethics of blogging about students, second installment

Okay, I scrolled over my posts for the semester and deleted two which referred to my recent plagiarism case. I have always been careful about the way I blog about students, but this is the incident that made me think very hard about this issue. I do not believe that the posts I deleted say anything that could be harmful to me or the student--in fact they revealed very little info about the case and were two of the shortest posts I have ever written. Just a couple of sentences each. But plagiarism is such a serious and touchy issue that I don't think there is a good way to blog about a case even in the vaguest terms.

So here's another post I want to question. In it I refer to general problems with my class, but I also mention a specific student (not by name, of course) who had not purchased a textbook. Is it okay to refer to one particular student in a blog?

I do believe that the way I discussed my class has been ethical, and I don't think it is anything that could get me into trouble (except that the fact that I have a blog at all is enough in some people's opinion to label me a trouble-maker or a slacker who spends too much time frivolously playing online instead of doing real work--but that's another issue and there's been plenty talk about that already). The problems of an online class are important to discuss and this electronic forum is the perfect medium for it. I believe that blogging about general class issues is useful and ethical, but I still have questions about any reference to a particular student, even when it is vague and anonymous.

Edited to add: I am not so concerned with the question of "Could I get fired for this?" although that is one way to look at it. I am really concerned about whether it is ethical behavior and if it might be some violation of students' trust.

election reaction and a plea to readers

My predictions were correct (but they weren't exactly long shots). The governor was elected with 40% of the vote. Which means 60% of the voters still wish he would go away. Pathetic. I don't blame Kinky because I think Carole Strayhorn took more votes from Perry than Kinky took from Bell. Bell would have had a chance if he'd had more money earlier on.

And the two local Congressional races I was watching were won by Democrats--two of the few Democrats who won in this state. They are both conservative Democrats endorsed by the NRA. But we're in Bush country. That is to be expected.

I was pretty cynical yesterday, not expecting to take much comfort in the results even if they did turn out the way I hoped. But today I am heartened by the overall shift in power. Perhaps optimism will follow.

That is enough for politics. I wish more people would respond to this. So far the only replies are from me and two people who do not blog about teaching at all (but I do appreciate their comments and their perspectives). Come on, guys. Where are the teacher-bloggers?

Election Day predictions

I am not trying to spark a huge debate. I don't like ugly political blog fighting and I try to avoid it. But we're finally at the end of this especially miserable campaign period, so now I'll say something. We have a terrible governor and everyone knows it. And today he will be re-elected. Kinky stands not a chance and I regret my initial support of him because he will put the nail in the Democrat's coffin. We are dooming ourselves. More predictions: Chet Edwards (Democrat-ish) will defeat Van Taylor but I don't really feel that much better about it. And on the upside, Tom Delay is gone, and no way can Shelly Sekula-Gibbs pull off a write-in win (this might be a situation in which she regrets the hyphen). Nick Lampson will have sweet revenge after losing his job to Tom Delay's butchery of congressional districts.

For those who use the Google homepage

May I suggest the "How-to of the Day" by WikiHow? So far it is my favorite module, and it makes me smile every day.

in which the semi-anonymous academic blogger ponders a question of ethics

I’ve asked my technical writing students to discuss ethics issues this semester, including issues of blogging in the workplace, and I thought that I might take a stab at a question that has been on my mind.

Is it ethical to discuss students on blogs?

I have written posts about my students and have read many posts about others’ students, with varying degrees of specificity. But is this okay? There are so many variables to this question—I will try to squeeze them into one blog post and hopefully people will read it even though it’s long. Let me start with what I am calling semi-anonymity and how that factors in.

I am not truly anonymous. Sarah is my real name (but don’t you know twenty other people named Sarah?). I do not post my location or institution, and if you Google me, you will not find this blog. If you came across this blog accidentally, however, I have posted enough information that someone who knows me well, or even someone who is currently taking my class, might figure out that this sounds awfully familiar. This seems like a stretch, but it has happened to me—I found a professor’s blog accidentally. I didn’t know it was him until I saw his photograph—I don’t post my picture on this blog. But I have given my URL to friends and to two former students, and it has gotten around through the grapevine that I’m a blogger, and a few professors have asked me about it (with mixed reactions—one person said, “My opinion of you has totally changed.”—vague comment, but I doubt it was good). I don’t really hide it. I imagine that many bloggers have similar circumstances.

The point is, while I am not readily Google-able, any discussion of my students could potentially be linked directly back to me, depending on who is reading it.

But I talk about my students in person with my coworkers all the time. This blog has been valuable to me as a way to discuss teaching issues with other teachers, and I find conversation among teachers in the halls or in our offices important ways to learn and improve. One might argue that it is not ethical to discuss students at all, but I think that we gain so much through these conversations that makes us better teachers. So is posting about students on a blog different from talking about them in person (assuming, of course, that names are never used)?

Okay, long enough for now. Any thoughts?

Teaching Carnival

Here is the Teaching Carnival.

I described feeling proud when I am linked on BlogHer. I also feel warm and fuzzy when I am in the Teaching Carnival. It's like I'm eating at the cool kids' table :) (Or what I imagine eating at the cool kids' table might feel like...)

this is my career. this is my work. really.

This is not what I meant to write about this week, but something came up. My feelings are hurt.

I talked on the phone with my father-in-law last night, who is really a nice, well-meaning man, but somehow he hurts my feelings every time I talk on the phone with him. Last night he asked me if I had a regular job yet since all I am doing is writing a dissertation. He thinks I should work an 8-5, I guess (which I do, really, but, you know, it's different somehow). This is the same man who told me before my daughter was born that he thought mothers should not work outside the home until their children are in school, which I took as a direct criticism of my mothering (because it was). When I was in my master's program he also told me that I should get another job in addition to school. This summer when I told him about the class I was teaching, he said, "I'm glad you're finally at the stage that you can teach." I've been teaching for five years. I told him last night that I am teaching now, and he seemed surprised again. Then he asked if it was all day long, 8-3. I guess he was thinking grade school. I told him that, no, I teach one class and work on my research and writing the rest of the time. He said he couldn't imagine why someone would take two or three years to write a book (that's how I have explained the dissertation to them). I told him that most people take that long and that I don't do only that. I also have my teaching, and I am trying to publish some articles before I graduate. (And raise one, and soon two kids, for crying out loud) Oh, he said, so you might be making some money before you graduate, then. I explained to him that you don't really make money in academic publishing, that it is a requirement of your job. Well, that doesn't make much sense, he said. His wife, my mother-in-law, is a teacher's aid and she makes the same amount of money that I make (which is pitiful and unfair to her and others who have that job but beside the point right now). If the legitimacy of my work is measured in income, which it seems to be to him, then why is my work less legitimate than hers? Or maybe it is not legitimate because it is school, not "real" work. They still have the idea that my career has not yet begun, not that I am currently working within my career. This is my career. And my job. And I do get paid. A little. Or maybe I'm just too old to be in school. I should be done by now.

Whatever it is, I feel like my work is completely devalued. When I went to the conference last weekend, it happened to be in the city where my brother-in-law lives, so we all planned a get-together after I presented my paper. Several of my in-laws came, and we had a nice weekend. No one asked me about my conference. Not one time. The only question they ever ask me is when I will be done. I usually let things like this roll off my back, but last night when he told me I should get a job, it hurt me badly.