Thursday, August 30, 2007
what to do with the fellowship
I've got a nice fellowship this year and I am not sure what to do with it at this point. I could always use more money to live on. Both girls are in daycare now, and it costs a lot. A whole lot. It would actually eat up the whole fellowship by itself. I saw my adviser yesterday and he said that he thinks I should take next semester off from teaching to take full advantage of the extra money. That would actually mean taking a student loan to pay for daycare, which is the way we would have to finance it if I didn't have the fellowship. And next year when I am hopefully wrapping things up and don't have that extra money, I will probably use loan money for daycare. So what should I do? Teaching obviously takes time away from dissertating, and I am behind where I wanted to be at this point. Having babies interrupts things and also makes for good excuses when I don't get things done. The fellowship is intended to facilitate the completion of my dissertation, and giving up my teaching for a semester would allow me to commit more fully to writing. But it can also be argued that reliable childcare does the same thing. I feel like that is a responsible use of that money. So I guess what it comes down to is a choice between time and money. In the end I know I could finish my diss sooner with that extra time, but in the big picture of the academic calendar, I'm not sure that it would equal graduating or getting a job sooner. Anyone else grappled with this decision?
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3 comments:
Hey, congratulations on the fellowship! I decided not to teach to fully focus on finishing my dissertation. This means I have given up tuition reimbursement along with my teaching income--ouch. Overall I believe this makes the most sense for my particular situation, but nevertheless I still have my moments of doubt (especially when progress is not where I'd like it to be).
I think you're right that it basically comes down to a choice between time or money. For me, teaching income + tuition reimbursement - daycare expenses = $0 at the end of the semester. So while I would avoid out-of-pocket expenses by teaching, I would probably also spend the majority of my time concentrating on teaching-related work rather than dissertation-related work and would therefore just add additional semesters onto my graduation date. Since I have reached the 'do or die point' in the dissertation process (meaning: if I don't finish this dissertation soon I am going to have to kill myself), time is more of a priority for me now than money. But I think it's a personal decision based on how you work best, what your future plans are, how the numbers work out, how much teaching takes out of you, etc. Good luck to you, whatever you decide. (PS--I have been thinking about giving up my blog too).
While I haven't experienced the option you're discussing, it seems important to consider more than the time vs. money aspect. That is, you might also need to think seriously about your personal work habits or preferences and writing style, which only you can speak to. For example, if you know that having nothing but the dissertation to work on during the day would be great, but you have a tendency to get distracted by other things (like doing laundry, cooking, or surfing the net-not that you do any of these - just examples), then having the semester off from teaching isn't going to get you any further along on the diss. Or, like some people find, they simply can't stick their head in diss work for 8 hours M-F...they'd rather do a few hours each day. Does that make sense?
I guess I'm just suggesting that you really tally up how much time teaching does or doesn't take away from your work on the dissertation, because if the kids are at daycare, then it doesn't sound like your work schedule would be affected by caring for them. For example, hubby really wants a non-teaching fellowship so that he can concentrate on writing the diss. Because his assignment requires him to attend class lectures (2x a week) on top of the discussion groups he leads (3x a week), and on top of the grading he does (around 50 students), his assignment takes up a LOT of his time. Not TAing for a semester would benefit him a great deal. Me, however, I don't know. Unless it's a week when papers are due, I don't spend more than 8 hours or so (including class time) working on the teaching stuff. So, I don't know that that 8 hours of time would really make the world of difference in terms of my diss work.
Anyway, you're the best judge of how you spend your work time and what kind of style, environment, or schedule helps you get work done (or not), and these seem to play at least as important a role as the money.
If I was in your shoes, I'd come up with a third idea -- cut my teaching time in half, and spend the non-teaching time on the dissertation.
If I had full-time, paid-time to work on the diss, I'd probably get distracted, procrastinate, etc. -- like Academama said. But if I was still doing some work, I think the diss would feel like a change of pace/break.
Good luck with your decision.
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